Second Day Crawling

It was some kinda day today. Or maybe I should not say that.

I did not get as much done as I had hoped to, but I wonder if I’m going to be saying that every day. (Probably so, Joe.)

There is a friend I have in mind and I hope she is reading this blog entry tonight because I couldn’t help but think about her the entire time while studying today, while I was studying about the Kabbalah anyway. At least I did that! Other than that, I only got about five drawings – sketches really – done, plus a few photographs. No video footage today unfortunately.

I was studying and meditating on the letter Beit, which comes next in the Hebrew alphabet, and is also the first letter in the Torah, opening Genesis.

Most of you probably know, and I have known for a long while that Beit mainly means House, I did’t know how in depth – of course – all this gets.

And I hope all of you know that I am not giving out lessons here. I am merely learning these things and just writing out my stupid interpretations of how perceive this stuff, as some of it is a little poetic to me. None is quite literal. Although, I’m sure many do  take it literally. I do not. I am, and always have been, pretty secular, as a Jew. Only in the last decade have I become a little more serious about this religion. Or rather, “a little more interested,” might be a better way to put it.

My true calling for it was nostalgic; an early family connection that I missed very much when my grandma was still alive. I missed the traditions mostly. I missed when the family was closer and like a network of loving women. Since then, I felt lost, and sad. Once I found the right synagogue, I think that changed and my interest deepened.

But back to Beit,  the house business. Genesis begins with a BIG Beit.  God had specific intentions about his house and our house. It was the original intention as a matter of fact and that’s why  Genesis starts out that way, because it’s, of course, more than just a house,  it’s what dwells inside  the house.

You have to look at it in terms of God being a house. A really big, powerful and loving house. And you are a house too. And yes, the temples were/are the houses where we connected to God, but not really. We are the ones that dwell inside them. But what about when the Temple was destroyed?

The Torah details a description of the Tabernacle and its vessels: “They shall build me a Temple and I will dwell in them.” Not “in it,” but “in them” – in each and every Jew. Not the temples. I see it this way.

This following paragraph is for my friend. I’m cutting and pasting it right out of The Channels of the Creative Consciousness:

Beit is numerically equal to the word “ta’avah,” which means “desire” or “passion” (412). In general, “ta’avah” connotes a negative human property. However, in several places “ta’avah” denotes the positive passion of the tzadik, the righteous man. One passage in Proverbs states: “He will fulfill the passion of the tzadik,” and a second says: “the passions of tzadikim are only good.” The “ta’avah” of G-d, the “Tzadik of the world,” is altogether above reason and logic. At this level one cannot ask “why.” As expressed by Rabbi Shneur Zalman of Liadi: “About passion, there can be no question.” As G-d is the essence of good so His passion is “only good.”

Some more connections leading back to this letter – it has everything to do with FREE WILL, being able to make choices between right and wrong, what is best to bring happiness to your personal house. It even talks about how your house also represents your partner. Beit  is the second letter in the alphabet, so its Divine number is two. Being after Aleph,  and the two being you and your mate for life, this is the kind of partnership that is next to the one you have with God.

Okay, enough with all that, here are some of the pictures I took today that I LOVE the most!






  1. This is beautiful. What you’ve written. I think altho’ real physical Temples are built, the most important Temples are in our hearts. Building an earthly temple is a manifestation of our inner temples. And let’s face it, we’re earthly & it helps to have a roof to come together under to worship. But G-d is our real roof and our real house.

    The pictures of your temporary house & around your house are also x-tra special beautiful. I love the colors. I love the Light. I love the Rocks. I have a ‘thing’ for rocks. I love the sense of space. It seemed to me, as a child, that most of the Bible (I’m a Christian) takes place in the desert & even tho’, literally, I knew that it was Not Our Desert, but one on the other side of the world, i always made that connection. And I always feel like there’s more room for G-d in the Desert. It’s the quiet you can hear.

  2. Hello Carol,

    Read your blog from the first post to the most recent. Your words are so descriptive and thoughtful and sincere and even enlightening — its a wonder glimpse of your experiences. I’m finding myself being drawn into your project in a sweetly vicarious way.

    Just wanted to send you shout outs of support from afar. You’re doing truly good (and dare I say ‘noble?’) work. Lots of love,


  3. Hi Carol,

    you were wishing for someone to say something like “hi”. Although I am not the “Joe” that you referred to, I am also Joe, to my friends. So, I decided to read your note on a personal level, for “pretend” that is. I am happy for you, that you are in a meditative mode. It was brave of you to go on a venture on your own. Firstly, congrats on the success of your project. Those pictures are beautiful. Keep those sketches coming.

    You are meditating on the letter Beit, being house. I have been dreaming about houses for years. I paint them all the time. In recurring dreams, It turns out that I’ve finally found my home, the house where I once was, a place where I was happy and that I have left a long long time ago. The reason why I keep forgetting where it is, is because the facade always changes: the street where it was, the colour of the door, even the city where it is. Sometimes the entrance is even hidden behind newer walls, built over the door. always in the dream, I need to convince the occupants to demolish newer walls, to access that old door. I promise them that there is something secret and beautiful in there, that all we have to do is to go up some stairs, that it is almost magic in there. There is sometimes a bright light coming from an upper floor. Sometimes it is very sunny and there is vegetation growing. Passed the door, there are always people smiling, sometimes busy with their hands or sitting around, content.
    In the dream, as I walk through the door, all the stress and fear that I’ve experienced for years, drops instantly and I am in a state of bliss. I am ” very high”.

    How could I forget that place where I have lived in peace? Why and how did I leave in the first place?

    When I wake up from those dreams, I feel very grateful to have been there once more, hopeful that I might find it again and finally be allowed to stay.

    This probably does not make much sense, but it is what it is. Meanwhile, I keep painting those houses.

    Hopefully, you will find what you are looking for, whether it is inspiration, peace or enlightenment.I am told that it is not a place but a state of mind… I guess that what counts, is not how you get there, but that you keep looking.

    Enjoy your precious time away.

    Jocelyne xo

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